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All 16 learnings · one per slide
Mistakes
Were Made
Carol Tavris and Elliot Aronson, in bytes
16 key learnings on why we justify foolish beliefs, bad decisions and hurtful acts.
16 learnings · ~40 sec eachSwipe →
Library / Mind & Psychology / Mistakes Were Made (But Not by Me)
Mistakes Were Made (But Not by Me), in bytes
16 key learnings from Carol Tavris and Elliot Aronson's book on cognitive dissonance and self-justification. Each takes about 40 seconds to read. Swipe, use the arrows, or your keyboard.
Mistakes
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Learning 1 · Introduction
Cognitive Dissonance
The idea
When our actions clash with our beliefs, we feel discomfort and change our thinking to reduce it.
Example
A smoker who says the evidence linking smoking to cancer is weak.
Takeaway
We justify rather than admit error.
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Learning 2 · Chapter 1
When Prophecy Fails
The story
Leon Festinger studied a cult whose prophecy of the world's end failed. Committed members became even more convinced.
The lesson
The more we've invested, the harder we justify.
Takeaway
Commitment hardens belief.
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Learning 3 · Chapter 1
Severe Initiations
The study
Aronson found people who went through a harsh initiation liked a dull group more.
Why
They had to justify the pain.
Takeaway
We value what costs us.
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Learning 4 · Chapter 1
The Pyramid of Choice
The idea
Two similar people make a small choice in opposite directions, then justify it until they're far apart.
Example
Two students tempted to cheat: one does, one doesn't, and each grows more certain.
Takeaway
Small steps lead to big divides.
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Learning 5 · Chapter 2
Blind Spots
The idea
We see others' biases more easily than our own.
Example
'I'm objective; they're biased.'
Spot it
Believing you're immune to influence.
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Learning 6 · Chapter 2
Gifts and Conflicts
The idea
Small gifts and favours can bias professionals without them realising.
Example
Doctors influenced by drug company gifts.
Takeaway
Influence starts small.
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Learning 7 · Chapter 3
Memory Rewrites History
The idea
Memories are reconstructed and shaped by self-justification.
Example
Remembering past choices as wiser than they were.
Takeaway
Memory isn't a recording.
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Learning 8 · Chapter 4
False Memories
The idea
Some therapists encouraged 'recovered memories' of abuse that turned out to be false.
The lesson
Professionals justified the method even as evidence mounted.
Takeaway
Even experts resist correction.
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Learning 9 · Chapter 5
Wrongful Convictions
The idea
Police and prosecutors who believe a suspect guilty may dismiss contradicting evidence.
Example
DNA exonerations showed many confident convictions were wrong.
Takeaway
Certainty can block justice.
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Learning 10 · Chapter 5
Interrogations
The idea
Interrogators trained to detect lies can become overconfident, sometimes pressuring innocent people into confessing.
Example
False confessions in high-profile cases.
Takeaway
Training doesn't remove bias.
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Learning 11 · Chapter 6
Love's Assassin
The idea
In relationships, self-justification turns small conflicts into blame and contempt.
Example
Seeing a partner's annoying habit as proof of their character.
Try this
Look at your role in a conflict.
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Learning 12 · Chapter 7
Spirals of Blame
The idea
Each side justifies its position, making feuds and wars worse.
Example
Conflicts where both sides see themselves as victims.
Takeaway
Self-justification escalates conflict.
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Learning 13
Leaders and War
The idea
Political leaders often double down on failing policies to avoid admitting error.
Example
Lyndon Johnson escalating in Vietnam.
Takeaway
Leaders need people willing to say no.
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Learning 14 · Chapter 1
The Ben Franklin Effect
The idea
Doing someone a favour can make you like them more, as you justify your kindness.
Example
Franklin won over a rival by borrowing a book from him.
Try this
Ask a small favour of someone you want to get on with.
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Learning 15 · Chapter 8
Admitting Mistakes
The idea
Admitting mistakes builds trust and enables learning.
Example
John F. Kennedy took responsibility for the failed Bay of Pigs invasion, and his popularity rose.
Takeaway
Owning mistakes is strength.
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Learning 16 · Chapter 8
Learn to Let Go
The idea
Separating your actions from your identity makes it easier to say 'I was wrong'.
Example
'I made a mistake' rather than 'I'm a failure'.
Reflect
What mistake could you admit today?
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All 16 learnings complete
That’s all 16 learnings.
Admitting mistakes is hard because it threatens how we see ourselves. Which mistake are you still justifying?
Abhay Kumar JaiswalFCA · PMP® · Workday Financeabhayjaiswal.com
Summaries in my own words. Read the book for the full stories.
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Summaries are written in my own words for learning. Read Mistakes Were Made (But Not by Me) by Carol Tavris and Elliot Aronson (2007) for the full stories. More Books in Bytes