Library / Philosophy & Meaning / The Book of Joy
16 key learnings from The Dalai Lama and Archbishop Desmond Tutu's conversations about finding joy amid suffering, recorded by Douglas Abrams. Each takes about 40 seconds to read. Swipe, use the arrows, or your keyboard.
All 16 learnings · one per slide
The Dalai Lama and Desmond Tutu, with Douglas Abrams, in bytes
16 key learnings from a week of conversations between the Dalai Lama and Desmond Tutu.
Learning 1
The story
In 2015, Desmond Tutu visited the Dalai Lama in Dharamsala for his 80th birthday, and they spent a week talking about joy.
Who
Two Nobel Peace laureates, both of whom faced oppression and exile.
Takeaway
Joy is possible even after great suffering.
Learning 2
The idea
Joy is deeper than happiness; it doesn't depend on circumstances.
Example
Both men laughed often despite hardships.
Takeaway
Joy can coexist with sorrow.
Learning 3
The idea
Fear, stress and anxiety are natural; perspective and compassion reduce them.
Example
Focusing on others' wellbeing eases your own worries.
Takeaway
Self-focus fuels fear.
Learning 4
The idea
Anger is natural, but holding on to it harms us.
Example
Tutu admits to getting angry; the Dalai Lama talks of anger as a destructive emotion.
Takeaway
Notice anger and let it pass.
Learning 5
The idea
Sadness connects us with others and can lead to compassion.
Example
Grief brings people together.
Takeaway
Sadness is part of joy.
Learning 6
The idea
Envy and loneliness come from comparison and separation.
Example
Seeing others' good fortune with goodwill.
Takeaway
Connection is the cure.
Learning 7
The idea
Both men spoke openly about mortality, including Tutu's cancer.
Example
Seeing death as part of life.
Takeaway
Accepting mortality deepens joy.
Learning 8
The idea
Seeing a situation from a wider view reduces suffering.
Example
The Dalai Lama sees his exile as also bringing opportunities.
Try this
Look at a problem from a wider angle.
Learning 9
The idea
Humility recognises our shared humanity.
Example
Tutu and the Dalai Lama teasing each other like old friends.
Takeaway
No one is above others.
Learning 10
The idea
Humour lightens life and brings people together.
Example
Their constant laughter during serious talks.
Takeaway
Laugh, especially at yourself.
Learning 11
The idea
Acceptance of reality is the starting point for change.
Example
Accepting a problem before working to change it.
Takeaway
Acceptance isn't passivity.
Learning 12
The idea
Forgiveness frees us from the past.
Example
Tutu chaired South Africa's Truth and Reconciliation Commission.
Takeaway
Forgiveness is a gift to yourself.
Learning 13
The idea
Gratitude turns attention to the good in life.
Example
Being thankful for small daily things.
Try this
Name three things you're grateful for tonight.
Learning 14
The idea
Compassion for others brings joy to ourselves.
Example
The Dalai Lama's daily practice of compassion.
Takeaway
Caring makes us happier.
Learning 15
The idea
Giving brings joy, more than receiving.
Example
Giving time, money or kindness.
Takeaway
Generosity is joy in action.
Learning 16
The idea
The book ends with practices like morning intention, gratitude, and meditation.
Example
Setting an intention to be kind each morning.
Reflect
Which pillar of joy could you strengthen this week?
All 16 learnings complete
Joy is found even in hardship. Which pillar of joy could you strengthen this week?
Summaries are written in my own words for learning. Read The Book of Joy by The Dalai Lama and Desmond Tutu, with Douglas Abrams (2016) for the full stories. More Books in Bytes
